Do you think that you are a bad mom, weigh too much, aren’t active enough, don’t drink enough water, and the list goes on and on? What if all of that isn’t a problem?
What if you just decided that where you are at today is okay? Does that seem dangerous to believe? My brain thinks so. If I get comfortable with where I am how will I ever get better. And heaven knows I’m not good enough right now.
Hating Yourself Better
I’d be down for staying in this I need to better headspace if it is working for you. But my guess is you make temporary changes and then resort back to old behaviors. You can only white knuckle it for so long. Am I right?
Thinking you’re fat and ugly may get you to start a diet for a couple weeks. Maybe you even loose the weight. But does it stay off or do you go back to old eating habits and gain it all back. Maybe even more than you lost. Does this sound familar?
If so there is your proof that hating yourself better isn’t making you better. You could even say you are going backwards instead.
Compassion Instead of Hate
So what’s the harm in trying to have compassion for yourself instead. Compassion is sympathetic concern for yourself. This might look like:
Hey you are overweight and that’s ok. Your body has worked like it should in the past. You gave it too many calories and it stored them for another time. Thank you body for functioning properly. You went through some really tought pregnancies and newborn phases. Thank you body for getting me through that hard time. You can walk and move. Thank you body for getting me where I need to be.
Notice how you are being grateful for how your body works. You are just acknowledging why your body is the way it is.
This can apply to why you yell, or don’t exercise as much as you’d like, etc. This tool of compassion can be used to on any reason you are down on yourself. Be careful not to judge yourself in this process.
Can You Love Your Body?
Can you get to the point that you love your body. That is the next step. Learning to love all your body does for you. Love doesn’t mean you like everything about yourself. Think of your children. Do you love them and like everything they ever do? Probably not. My guess is those tantrums aren’t fun to deal with, but you still love that kid with all your heart.
Think of yourself as another kid to love. What do you love about yourself? Having a hard time coming up with things? Go back to that list of things your body is doing right. Focus on those. Start with small things like I keep the kids alive. I don’t let them go hungry. My body helps me get the things done that I need to. And build up from there.
Change from Love
Once you love yourself, then true change can come. You can exercise because you love yourself and want to take care of your body. That is a different feeling and motivation than I’m disgusting.
With a thought like I’m disgusting, you are punishing yourself with a workout. But if you love yourself then you want to care for your body. It’s easier to have compassion when you miss a workout. Celebrating the small wins is easier to do and motivating. You are more likely to stick to it long term.
Not sure where to start or how to love your body? Don’t worry, I’ve got you. Schedule a free 30 minute call where we can discuss you and your situation. Let’s get you started on your journey by clicking this link to my calendar.
Until Next Time
-Keira
